The "table you never touch on Tuesdays" line is too real. We have a stored proc from 2014 that predates half the team. Nobody knows exactly what it does, but we know it must run before the ETL jobs or finance starts getting emails with NULLs where the numbers should be. The guy who wrote it retired in 2019. We call it "Dave's Legacy."
Copilot can't tell you about Dave's Legacy. Neither can ChatGPT. I've tried. It just confidently suggests refactoring it into microservices.
The Garman quote is the most grounded take I've seen from a tech CEO in years. "That is one of the dumbest things I've ever heard" should be printed on a poster. The man runs AWS - he's seen what happens when tribal knowledge walks out the door. Spoiler: it's not pretty and it's not cheap.
Also appreciated the "very expensive autocomplete" framing. That's going in my rotation next time someone suggests we replace the junior DBAs with AI. Sure, let Copilot handle the 3 AM pager duty. I'm sure it'll know that you have to restart the replication agent before the failover, not after, because of that one config change someone made in 2017 that nobody documented.
